What To Do If You Are Experiencing The Pressure Of The Biological Clock

Medically reviewed by Corey Pitts, MA, LCMHC, LCAS, CCS
Updated July 18, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

The phrase “biological clock” typically refers to two separate concepts. The first concept is the “biological clock” that is inside every human body and many other living organisms as well, referring to circadian rhythms and the sleep-wake cycle. These biological clocks can be impacted by several external factors, including travel between time zones and exposure to different kinds of light. 

The other conception of the “biological clock” is usually related to fertility, almost always women’s fertility. It generally refers to the fact that as a woman grows older, her fertility tends to decline, and it can become more difficult for her to get pregnant. Those experiencing anxiety related to this concept may benefit from learning more about fertility, freezing their eggs, and speaking to a licensed therapist about their concerns.

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Experiencing anxiety about fertility and aging?

The origin of the pressure of the biological clock

In colloquial conversation, the phrase “biological clock” is often used as a metaphor to describe the pressure many women experience to find a male partner and have children with him before a certain age. The word “biological” may lead many people to erroneously conclude that such pressure is a natural and unavoidable part of being a woman, and that it is inevitable for a woman to eventually want to become a mother. However, the biological clock can be considered a social construct.

Similar pressure is rarely discussed in regard to men, although reproductive endocrinology research indicates that male fertility usually also declines with age, and that 40% of heterosexual couples seeking assistive fertility treatments do so because of fertility problems associated with a male partner. Approximately 40% of cases are because of concerns associated with female fertility, and in 20% of cases, it cannot be definitively determined which partner has fertility complications. 

Pregnancies involving older men usually have a higher risk of miscarriage, preterm delivery, and other complications that could lead to outcomes other than a healthy baby. Children born to older fathers typically also demonstrate a higher risk of developing schizophrenia, learning disabilities, epilepsy, and some forms of cancer.

The biological clock in women and men

If there are medical imperatives for both women and men to have children at younger ages, why does so much of the “biological clock” discussion center around women’s fertility in particular? The focus may tie into assumptions about a woman’s primary purpose being motherhood, as well as beliefs that it is “natural” for all women to want to become biological mothers with a heterosexual partner. 

Researcher, author, and journalist Moira Weigel points out that the phrase “biological clock” became a mainstream reference to female fertility in the 1970s. During this time period, economic pressures led more families to be headed by two parents who both worked full-time, as opposed to the traditional model of a father who worked and a mother who raised the children. Societal anxiety about declining fertility rates and women’s increasing workforce participation was high.

Weigel argues, “The story of the biological clock is a story about science and sexism. It illustrates the ways that assumptions about gender can shape the priorities for scientific research, and scientific discoveries can be deployed to serve sexist ends. We are used to thinking about metaphors like ‘the biological clock’ as if they were not metaphors at all, but simply neutral descriptions of facts about the human body. Yet, if we examine where the term came from, and how it came to be used, it becomes clear that the idea of the biological clock has as much to do with culture as with nature.” 

How to address pressure related to the biological clock

Regardless of the origins of the concept of the biological clock, some women experience anxiety about the passage of time and the potential onset of menopause. The experiences of such women can be widely varied, from women who have not found the right partner to women who are not sure if they want to be biological mothers but are afraid that the window of time they have to make up their minds is closing. 

All of these worries and anxieties are valid, and there are a number of steps women can take to alleviate some of the pressure.

Educate yourself

Much of the current discussion around the “biological clock” of female fertility may be based on outdated science. As psychologist Jean Twenge has indicated, many doctors and medical associations frequently cite a statistic claiming that after the age of 35, one in three women will no longer be able to conceive and will meet the medical definition of infertility. 

It can be important to note, though, that this statistic is drawn from a scientific article published in 2004. The analysis itself is 20 years old, but to compound the situation, the original article used data from fifteenth-century France – a society where the average life expectancy was 42 years old

Medicine has made significant advances since this time period, and more recent and scientifically rigorous studies indicate that female fertility typically does not significantly decline until after age 40. Many women may have a much wider window for natural conception than conventional medical wisdom may suggest.

Consider egg freezing

Knowing that fertility can last into a woman’s forties may not be a source of comfort for all women with anxiety about fertility and aging. If you believe you would be less worried if you could have more control over your fertility timeline, you may want to look into freezing your eggs. 

In general, egg freezing involves taking medication to bolster your egg production and undergoing a “harvesting” procedure in which the eggs are removed from your body. Your eggs can then be cryogenically preserved and, hypothetically, used at any point in the future. If you would like to use your frozen eggs at a later point with a male partner, you can initiate in vitro fertilization (IVF) treatments to implant a fertilized egg or embryo inside your uterus, where it can mature into a pregnancy.

However, it can be crucial to recognize that egg freezing can be expensive and may lead to health complications, including significant side effects from the fertility medication. Recent research has also indicated that pregnancies resulting from frozen embryo transfer may be at an increased risk of high blood pressure, which can lead to pregnancy complications. Talk to your doctor to see if egg freezing and IVF procedures are safe options for you. 

Speak to a mental health professional

Stress about family planning can take a significant toll on a person’s mental health. If anxiety about your “biological clock” is impacting your day-to-day life, it may be helpful to speak to a therapist. 

A close up of a middle aged woman as she stands in her home and gazes off deep in thought.
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Experiencing anxiety about fertility and aging?

If you are juggling appointments with an IVF specialist and managing fertility medication, adding another in-person appointment to your schedule may not be the most realistic choice. In these situations, online therapy can be a beneficial option. With online therapy, you can attend sessions from the safety and convenience of your own home.  

Research has consistently found that attending therapy online usually results in the same outcomes as in-person therapy. Although the research on online therapy for distress related to infertility is limited, as such therapeutic interventions have not been in use for very long, a recent review found that this kind of treatment shows promise. If you are experiencing complicated feelings about the biological clock, it could be helpful to talk to an online therapist. 

Takeaway

Many women experience anxiety about the impact of their age on their ability to have children. Educating oneself and considering options like egg freezing may be helpful. In addition, online or in-person therapy may be a beneficial forum for processing worries related to fertility and family planning.
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